ADVICE: What could I do to get my father to love me even though I don’t like football?

Dear Friend,

Make him an actual football from scratch.  In front of him.  Once he sees the brutal process that goes into butchering a cow for its hide just so it can be thrown around by a bunch of sweaty, gargantuan men he will hopefully see the error of his ways.  Plus, you’ll have plenty of delicious steak to eat together afterwards.

Love,

Your Friend Sara