BY MELISSA MARTONE
I go to bed next to you every night. I wake up next to you every morning, and that’s okay. I love you, there’s no question about that. However, you’d better shut your snoring mouth before I put something terrible in it. Your sprawled out, slack-jawed, sleeping figure could not be dearer to me, but I will not hesitate to sprinkle cat litter in your mouth the next time you roll over and snore directly into my face.
Your Adoring GirlfriendRead More